nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
