Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
