just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I am spending my child support on dildos
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
