Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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