I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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