nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
