i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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