The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
whose parrot is this?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize