So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
