I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
