it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Randomize
