is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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