Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
