Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize