At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize