you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
