cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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