does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
