I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
