he puts the penis in happiness.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
