I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
