just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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