ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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