Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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