He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize