Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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