did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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