You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
You're like the curious george of whores
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
