By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize