WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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