And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
