YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
