btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
My underwear smells like fireworks.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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