and you said cock pushups were impossible
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
