im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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