Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
