to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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