I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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