i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
