Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
