This is not my ceiling
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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