Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Randomize
