i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
