Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize
