dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
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