mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
