please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
