um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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