if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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