woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
