So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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